Saturday, 31 March 2012

Azeri cake - is

Zebra cake!


It's just hit me - Eight weeks from this very night.....

For the first time in twelve years I will not be at a Eurovision Song Contest Final, further more in Fifty Two days time, for the first time, I won't be at any Semi Final or public qualifying round thereby breaking a total unbeaten run (I'd been to every one of the blighters!!)

It doesn't make me happy - however I just cant justify the expense at the moment - doesnt mean, however, that this site will be any the less active during the weeks of the contest  - oh deary me no - you've already had your first Azeri cheese, you'll be getting updates from about the place and it'll all be hunky dory!

Just pity my work team on the 2nd rehearsal week when I am not in Baku-on-sea, but with them with a grumpy face on , they are already taking donations ;)

Friday, 30 March 2012

View from the Kiek in de Kök - Part 4

We're nearly there...

10. Croatia – We’re nearly there with les ex-Républiques Yougoslaves. I understand Nina Badrič has seen a summer or two and her voice seems to reflect this. It’s maybe a bit too similar to the previous song, but doesn’t seem to have the same impact. To be honest, in some quarters (but not all) Eurovision is a young singer’s game. Will this qualify? No.

11. Sweden – What do we have here? A potential winner? The most over-hyped song since something by Kate Ryanair? To be fair, it sounds like a lot of other songs that have been successful. It reminds me of something from the era of disco by Donna Summer, so should suit those born in the distant 1960s or 1970s. I think it might be tooooo obvious to win, and its draw in the final will certainly play a part. The crucial second spot in the Saturday night final and it’s dead in the water – a tactical draw near the end and we could be at some 65,000 seater arena on the outskirts of Stockholm with a 9pm local start time in 2013. Will this qualify? As sure as my name is Riigiametnik.

12. Georgia – From the sublime to the downright ridiculous. Jocker? Joker? Is it code for something special in Tbilisi? Between winning his ticket and releasing his video, Anri seems to have got 30 times kitscher. I don’t think Georgia have really tried this year – in the words of my old history teacher Mr Pruun, “Could do better”. Will this qualify? No way Pedro.

13. Turkey – The Turks have reverted to type this year, with a typical crowd-pleasing ethnic pop. I didn’t realise Mr Bonio was one of Turkey’s small Jewish community, and this definitely has a bit of Kletzmer about it. More please I say and the prospect of a Turkish party with a bit of kosher food thrown in sounds good. Will this qualify? Yes

14. Estonia – Yeh!! Time for a bit of class. Three upbeat songs and then we have a perfect song to take things down a tempo or two. Ott has stayed in his native eesti keelt which is right and proper. I think it starts a little like Nilsson’s classic ‘Without you’ and it builds just as well. OK, so I can’t be totally unbiased, but don’t you like a site that actually has opinions? Anyways, will this qualify? You betcha.

15. Slovakia – One of Eurovision’s most unlucky countries tries something different and they have to be commended. There’s no other song like it in Baku and it grabs you by the unmentionables and says ‘listen to me’. Some of the watching populace, if they haven’t been roused during the previous song, will be when MJM/Miro Šmajda struts his funky thang. Will this qualify? I’d like to think so, but I think the unlucky streak will continue.

16. Norway – Following on in the great tradition of Iranian born performers at Eurovision (Arash of Aysel and Arash, erm, that’s it), Tooji does his best to be the 2012 vintage of Eric Saade. This sort of shtick has worked before, so who’s to say it won’t work this year. After all, he gives a very slick delivery and this time the glass all shatters on cue (oops, that was last year). Will this qualify? Yes.

17. Bosnia-Herzegovina – A pleasant little number from what seems like the same team that wrote for Amila ‘Morticia’ Glamočak in the dim and distant past. Does this go anywhere? Well, it’s just pleasant. Nothing more, nothing less. But she is very pretty, and a few voters in dirty raincoats might find that rather appealing. Will this qualify? I think it’s just too ordinary to qualify.

18. Lithuania – Finally we have a refugee from some boyband who is paying tribute to such illustrious names as Serafin Zubiri, Csaba Szigeti and Diana Gurtskaya. Then he decides it’s in poor taste and ditches the blindfold he probably got free on the Emirates flight to Brisbane. This is a bit too George Michael for me and not the best way to end a semi-final. I still think Lithuania hasn’t quite ‘got’ Eurovision yet. Will this qualify? No.

So, from this bunch of musical goodness, the 10 qualifiers I’d pick are Serbia, Netherlands, Malta, Belarus, Ukraine, Slovenia, Sweden, Turkey, Estonia, Norway.

Thursday, 29 March 2012

Azeri Cheese - no seriously..........

Do you know hard hard it was to find a pic of Azeri Cheese!! - This is it!!
More please?!?!?

I am gonna say this once and once only.

If you don't like what you read here, that's cool, but at least put your name on a comment so we can either go "yup. Yer right" or "hahahahahah" and mock you senseless.

Most of you that come here know what the form is, and that ain't changing. We're not esctoday or so if you are looking for sanitised reports both in terms of the reviews and the rehearsals, with no personal input and a party line Eric Honicker would be proud of, you may wish to consider your choice of reading material.

However, if you are prepared to see lots of cheese references, possible cake porn shots, descriptions of Baku, mad Estonians, real journos chipping in, or indeed dogs in shoes from Moscow, may I entice you with something from the wine list?? Sit down, relax and enjoy.

It's been the same for 13 years, it ain't changing now!!!!

Monday, 26 March 2012

View from the Kiek in de Kök - Part 3

So I had a little sojourn over the weekend including a fun night at a place called Sepp Kõrts. All very good. This second semi-final is a different kettle or pollock to the first one. A lot more open with maybe one or two certs. We also have five, yes, count them, five of the former Yugoslav republics in this semi-final. Thursday 24 May could be fun...

1. Serbia – Serbia’s cross between Mr Eurovision and Dennis Waterman (competed in the show, written songs for the show, presented the show…) is back with a half decent song he’s thankfully kept in his native tongue. Anything he does will always be overshadowed by the brilliant ‘Lane moje’, but this one must stand a chance. First on is never a bad draw if you have an average song or better. So will this qualify? Easily.

2. Macedonia FYR – Part II in our five-part cavalcade of former Yugoslavia is the little country that used to punch above its weight until the EBU had the wizard wheeze of introducing juries. But 60-a-day Kaliopi (formerly of the Grill) hasn’t done half bad with this. Whether her gravelly voice will satisfy those voters out there is a little beyond me. Will this qualify? Borderline.

3. Netherlands – Every good Eurovision stage needs feathers – the more the better. Bring on them crazy Dutch (with their shwimming and their shnorkelling) to satisfy pteronophiles everywhere. Why Indian Joan is dressed as such is beyond me, but what’s not to make you smile. And the world needs more smiling. She appears winsome in the delivery like she has a ‘special’ secret she doesn’t want to share. Part of me thinks this will scrape through to Saturday night, and part thinks it’ll be this years’ Kuunkuiskaajat. Will this qualify? I have absolutely no idea.

4. Malta – Some of my fellow bloggers were there when this was picked. Should I join them next year, dear reader? Kurt’s song appears to have been around for months and months, and I vaguely remember it being instant at the time. Those draw statisticians out there are bound to tell us the whys and wherefores are being drawn fourth between a Native American wannabe and a national final’s runners-up. Will this qualify? I think this has something about it. It won’t win this semi-final, but might just scrape in.

5. Belarus – Our White Russian brethren ditched their first choice, and I think they’ve made the right decision. I can’t help likening the lead singer’s voice to Chad Kroeger of Nickelback (but that’s just me). I may use the word contemporary often (not as often as the word cheese though), but this is a contemporary song that should get Belarus through to the final. No gimmicks like lift doors or insects this time, but just a good honest pop song. Will this qualify? Yes.

6. Portugal – Trainee for the monicker of Mr Eurovision, Andrej Babić, has got his sticky little mitts involved in another song for Portugal. It’s typical Portuguese stuff, but maybe not up to the standard of Senhora do mar. Still, it’s between two bouts of more upbeatedness, so may strike a chord with some of the populous out there. Will this qualify? Hmmm, will finish somewhere between 8th and 13th.

7. Ukraine – Lunacy strikes again with a big bold number that curiously isn’t a replacement song for one that won a first Ukrainian national final. It has a hook to it and a larger than life voice in Gaitana. Would I want to be her guest? Hmmm, I’ll get back to you on that. Will it qualify? It will indeed.

8. Bulgaria – Some might describe this as a similar song. To me, it has a classic disco vibe that will fill the floor at the Baku Euroclub. It seems to have a bit of every language going, except Udmurt or Estonian (pulls sad face) which makes it slightly un-unlimited to me. But that aside, it may be mad enough to get through to the Saturday night bunfight at the OK Crystal Hall. Will this qualify? Maybe

9. Slovenia – Eurovision wouldn’t be Eurovision without a 16 year old performer, and this one ain’t half bad – a bit like the first two instalments of our musical tour around former Yugoslavia. I think her lovely backing singers need to ditch their gravity-defying nets to stop the pointing and laughing that may take place for the three minutes of this song. If she plays this right though, it could mean Spring 2013 in Ljubljana. Will this qualify? Yes

Sunday, 25 March 2012

Semi 1 review - Parte the seconde....

10. Israel

I don’t know what it is about this song – Maybe its cos it sounds like Dream Lover in the verses, maybe cos it sounds like a mix of other 60’s songs that mean that this sounds oh so familiar but it is very strong.  Lead singer is hardly a looker, but he has that Cool Music Teacher vibe that could well make this song qualify.

11. San Marino

Mum?!, Do I really have to write something about this song??? – really?!?!? – Oh ok then….  It’s hideous, ill conceived, trite nonsense.  Valentina needs to distance herself from this song after May 23rd.  The Siegel music isn’t the worst part about this – the worst bit is the fact that someone who has OGAE connections wrote the first set of “lyric” without reading the rules!! – Fan Fail there if ever there was some.  It deserves nil.. And “ Googling, giggling, gaggling” is possibly enough to cite this for crimes against the English Language!

12. Cyprus

Thankfully the draw has been kind to mini Greece.  No Introduction nonsense here, oh dear me no, Ivi gets straight into the attack from second one.  It is, as has been remarked, remarkably similar to the Greek song in terms or rhythm and intended audience, but it is far far better than that nonsense.  It has a hook and a darn good earworm of a tune.  My only issue is the fact that its been proved she is not the greatest live singer, and in a live singing contest, that’s gonna prove a massive downfall – mind you, if it doesn’t matter for Jedward….  Qualifying? I should think so. 

13. Denmark

It does seem many years ago since this song was picked.  So far in the dim and distant past I actually had to hear it twice to remember it.   Am not sure that Teen Angst goes down well in Eurovision but again, like Israel, it sounds like some kind of chart nonsense that we have heard before in the mid 90’s by someone that should have not had a career ( Alisha Keys or someone of that ilk perhaps) – It is a typical Danish Plodder – though she needs to get rid of the stupid hat she wore in the Danish Final. Does it have any redeeming features? – Yeah, its familiar and doesn’t make me want to scream “ STFU” at the screen.  It’s what the Danes do well – boringly  predictable.  Qualifying? – Yeah.

14. Russia

If Denmark was boringly predicable and friendly, the Russia Grannies are the Eurovision equivalent of a glass of Irn Bru.  Peculiar looking,  should be vile on the palate and yet is full of e numbers and makes you bounce around!! I can’t, I admit, get through all 3 minutes of this song, as its not to my taste, however I can see that some people will like it lots and give it loads of votes.  It should qualify on the basis that it beat Bima Dilan in a Russian Final quite handily and, for that alone, I am grateful!

15. Hungary

Compact Disco give us a real gutsy track for this one.  It’s a decent and well sung song – However, I think it’s a little bit *too* earnest to do that well despite being the classiest song for some time in this bit.   I just don’t know what is going to differentiate it from the madness before it, and the quite frank genius that comes after it.  If you want a change of pace, this is your one.

16. Austria

This is Genius of the highest order!! – It’s the track that Scooter should have won the German Final with all those years ago when they got trounced.  It has everything 1994 Trance has, including a lack of lyric and talent – but the boys are nice enough and will garner  points from…..well… Germany I would guess ( If they were in this bit!).  Not sure how German “rap” will go down well outside of Germanophiles, but its either gonna bomb spectacularly or score loads!

17. Romania

I didn’t realise Colin Farrell’s younger and more talented brother had emigrated to Romania and decided to sing, but there you go.  This song makes me smile but I fear that its going to be swallowed up by Austria and Ireland to get that many votes.  They were supposed to win this contest fbetween 2002-2007 – has anyone told TVR that they failed to get that win?? – Try harder!!

18. Ireland

What has been said last year could well be written again about this lot.  We know what we’re going to get and the question is “ is that one trick pony back for a 2nd attempt?” – They appear to have learnt to sing a half decent, but ultimately half arsed schlager song.   It is something that would be in Eurosong in 1988 or 1993.  It’s arguably more old fashioned that San Marino, but I think that they will get it through to the final.  Qualifying? Sadly.

Thursday, 22 March 2012

View from the Kiek in de Kök - Part 2

10. Israel – We all love a bit of insanity – I positively thrive on it, as you can probably tell by my opinions so far. Izabo do not disappoint and this pleases me. The thing that gets me hooked is not the shrewd interplay between English and Hebrew, nor the oriental influence. For me, dear reader, it’s the bursts of strings á la A-ba-ni-bi. It takes me back to those distant 1970s. But on a more general level, I always rated the Teapacks from 2007, so this hits the spot for me. Will this qualify? I darn hope so.

11. San Marino – There’s only one thing worse than being talked about, and that’s not being talked about. Such is the world’s oldest republic and their crazy attempts to curry favour with the cybernetic masses, but even changing the title to make it more generic won’t help. Maybe I should write a song with Sven Lõhmus about ‘’*. It’s bound to be a smash. Will this qualify? Erm, no.

12. Cyprus – Our other songstress from the Helleno-sphere ha-ha-has a ba-ba-battle on her ha-ha-hands. Ca-ca-can she sing live? Ca-ca-can she stop the sta-sta-stammering. I’ll stop now. A doyen of another website helped select this little ditty, so the fans have had their much-maligned influence here and only have themselves to blame if it doesn’t qualify. She’s easy on the eye and is maybe better than Ms Eleftheriou’s similar song. Will this qualify? I think Greece might just have the edge.

13. Denmark – Our third Nordic song is as good as the other two, however I don’t see all three getting through to the final. But heck, Denmark has had four consecutive top 10 finishes since failed fan-fave DQ. Soluna looks quirky, which may jog the jaded televoter’s memory come voting time. If she performs it well the juries across 20 countries may like it too. Will this qualify? I think so.

14. Russia – How dare johnny-foreigner send older performers that Saint Hump. But this is lunacy personified. One of our grannies has had grief from her husband because she won’t be able to milk their animals while she’s getting pie-eyed in Baku’s Euroclub on Bacardi & coke every night. This is great and gives us our first taste of Udmurt (more please I say). And I love a song that makes me chuckle. They may not be young, but I’m sure they could show us a trick or two, even with their teeth out. Will this qualify? At an absolute canter.

15. Hungary – A nice contrast with turbo-folk, if you can call the granny’s song turbo-folk. I really like this contemporary song. It’s sung by a nicely credible group and who wouldn’t love a contest in the linguistically-baffling Magyarország. It has a decent draw too, towards the end. Will this qualify? Yes.

16. Austria – More quirkiness in the form of German-ish rap from the Tracks Hittaz (that’s right, isn’t it?). It could be said there’s going to be something for everyone here. A muscular chap of semi-Chinese extraction. A hobbit. Lovely laydeez shaking their ‘Popo’. What’s not to like? I for one like this even if the lyric and band name are a little near the knuckle. Eurovision doesn’t rest on its laurels – so we’re told – so this could be the way forward. Will this qualify? I hope so, although it may just be toooo progressive.

17. Moldova – I first was not happy when Transbalcanica didn’t get the golden ticket to Jon Ola Sand’s Cheese Factory in Baku. But then I heard this and I found it very pleasant. Maybe he needs to polish his accent so he sounds more Chiswick than Chişinau. I may even buy a trumpet to celebrate this song too. Will this qualify? I’d like it to.

18. Ireland – Finally, the most annoy thing this side of the Farthing Bridge rears its insanely coiffured heads again. I’d had my fill of these, erm, ‘characters’ five minutes after they arrived in Düss last year. Many of my fellow journos were going head over heels everytime they said ‘Oh my God’ or something as daft. And they did far better than I thought they would. Now, this year is, in my opinion, a slightly superior song. I will probably still want to kill them in Baku, but maybe they’ve matured a little. Will this qualify? Sadly yes.

* Other websites are, of course, available.

So it looks like my qualifiers after the carnage will be, in semi-final running particular order: Iceland, Greece, Latvia, Switzerland, Israel, Denmark, Russia, Hungary, Moldova, Ireland.

Part 3 will hopefully follow tomorrow.

Views from the unaccreditable... Part one

1. Montenegro
I don't rightly know what to make of it - I should understand the concept and hate the song... oh, wait... Thats about how it is.  The Montenegrins have been brave, but ultimately foolhardy?! - Qualifying?? Hell to the No.

2. Iceland
As you know if you read this often enough, wrong song won in Iceland and they have been saddled with a bad rewrite of a good vocal performance.  I think for all its drama it's just the wrong side of camp enough to qualify handsomely.  Europe like this sort of thing, but whether it'll get any further up a real scoreboard I'm doubtful.

3. Greece
Is it me?, or do we have to sue the Greeks for more money that they cant pay us back.  An Aphrodisiac is something that makes you fall in love, yeah,  not give you heartburn which this song does to me. It's generic Greece-by-numbers tosh that will appeal to its usual constituency which clearly is going to be enough to get StarTV banned *again* but if there is any justice it'll fall in the final as it's flatter than a squished hedgehog.  Qualifying, sadly.

4. Latvia
You know I love this song, but I can do it justice.  Beautiful Song? Not-so-much.  However, it does have a tune and a beat and a very repetitive and annoying back story.  Dissapointed that the lyric has been changed, but it still makes me smile and Anmary will give this one hell of a performance.  Plus side, video is very good and well made, but I fear that my constant pushing of this song will not even help it score points.... sadly.... boo-hoo.   I also think Sir Jagger, Mick will not be calling her ever....

5. Albania
Imagine Audrey Hepburn singing at you in Albanian.... that's what you are getting here in a nutshel to be honest.  Albanian is not the most earworm friendly language you'll ever hear, but this song has a certain..........."thing" about it now its had the usual amputation from RTSH - it could just be Audrey/Rona screaming at me - but the Juries might like that sort of thing.  Qualifying? - Not sure....

6. Romania
You know what this contest needs about now?... Something Uptempo.... and what do we get..... Half-arsed Uptempo.  Whilst Mandinga's is a good song and it tries its best to be positive and light and almost Spanish - It just misses the mark for me.  It's earnest enough to qualify easily and has all the ingredients but, unlike a cake from the Farmhouse Kitchen Microwave cookbook ( go on, look that reference up!), it hasn't been mixed to perfection, or pricked enough with a stick to rise to the occassion... More underdone souflee than prize winning Battenburg.  Grace Mulligan wouldn't be happy! Qualifying? - Yes

7. Switzerland
Many many moons ago, this lot qualified from a contest that was held in Ticino in a pub with Barbara Berta in attendance.  Now, I dont know about you, but if *my* country entered a song from a group singing down at the Dog and Duck public house, I would ensure that "free language" meant " Decernable English" - Again, its a Roy Walker song, "Good, but not right" - It has all the right elements, but that very bad English is glaringly bad.   Qualifying? - No

8. Belgium
 "Come and find me, I've been hiding from you" - No you haven't Iris, you're at the bottom of the scoreboard and we can seeeeee you or have you been playing hide and seek with the qualifying envolopes again you cheeky little scamp and forgot to put yourself in one? - I digress.... but the point is badly made.  This is a light song which will come up empty.  Possibly the weakest song of the 8 so far and clearly the weakest singer - adding up to the weakest link?! - Qualifying? - No

9.  Finland
Ahhh the Swede-o-Finns come up next.  Again, its very... um.... Finnish to be honest and, at the risk of repeating myself AGAIN (again....) it is the ingredients of a very fine cheese, all ready to be ripened with metal skewers in it but, at the last moment, some bastard came and removed the milk!! - It got something missing and I cant work out what.... probably a chorus I shouldn't wonder.  Qualifying? - No.

Wednesday, 21 March 2012

View from the Kiek in de Kök - Part 1

I thought I'd share some of my thoughts on the draw, now that it has eventually taken place in Bakı. You may not share my views, but there's nothing like a bit of debate to pick apart the merits of a Latvian's song writing skills. My thoughts will be a trilogy in five parts. Two posts for each semi, and then another for the six lucky finalists. So here we go:

1. Montenegro – So the Stevan Faddy memorial slot has been taken by Rambo Amadeus. We all know that the still-shiny-and-relatively-new little Adriatic nation loves rehearsing early on a Sunday morning, so the good people at the EBU didn’t disappoint by giving them their much coveted slot. Will this qualify? The omens aren’t good.

2. Iceland – As pointed out by a fellow blogger, Jónsi and Gréta still appear to be looking for that elusive yummy gingerbread house in an opera written by Gerry Dorsey. Or something like that. It’s a darn good song from a pretty good national final, so the early draw should not damage their chances. It’s also wedged between two more upbeat songs which can help its cause. Will this qualify? Yes.

3. Greece – Aaahh, the memories of a national final in a shopping centre. You see, there is money knocking around in the Hellenic Republic. And not just at those high-end shops like DrachmaEuro-land either. Anyways, this blogger’s concern is whether Ms Eleftheriou (so good they almost named her twice) can sing live. Will this qualify? It’s one out of either this or Cyprus.

4. Latvia – I was born in the distant 197X, the year that [insert demonyn] [insert singer] won. There, this is such a versatile song. But name checking Sirs Mick Jagger and Paul McCartney might only prove useful if they’re actually watching Europe’s favourite TV show. Now a beautiful song for me would be about cake or cheese, but I’m not most of Europe, and I won’t be televoting on 22 May. So Europe may like this. Will this qualify? Probably.

5. Albania – Chosen sometime in the previous decade it seems, Albania has done its usual trick of picking a seven-minute song they then cut down, re-arrange, re-write and then scare the rest of Europe with. To be fair, Rona’s got a fine pair of lungs on her in more of a Monica Aspelund than a Dolly Parton sort of way. If we want drama, then this is your song. Will this qualify? I somehow don’t think so.

6. Romania – Some upbeat niceness next from the country that is sure to win the contest within five years. Not quite sure where that five-year period started though. But this is fun, it’s multi-lingual (written that way it seems, not one of your “let’s cobble together an English version sharpish” songs), and it works. Will this qualify? Hell yes.

7. Switzerland – A long time ago, before I got those delightful socks for Christmas from Aunty Silvi, the Swiss Confederation picked a song that beat Lys Assia – she who always expects a standing ovation. I like this, as it reminds me of my youth (I was born in distant 197X remember). But somehow I think it might just get through this bloodbath of a semi-final. Will this qualify? Depends how many children of the 1970s and early 1980s will be watching.

8. Belgium – Plucky little Belgium aim to please with a performer who went to the Dolores O’Riordan School of Warble. She’s very sweet and it’s a pleasant song. But – there’s always a but – it might not stand out enough to make it through to Saturday’s shindig at the Crystal Hall. Will this qualify? I can’t decide on this one and maybe it’ll grow on me.

9. Finland – Recently I had to remind someone who commented on how nice the Finnish language sounded, that this was in Swedish. Only the second time Finland has done this I understand. She’s similarly sweet like our Belgium’s Iris. So maybe there’s going to be an almighty catfight between these two for one berth in the final. Will this qualify? Borderline, but I think sadly not.

More soon.

Monday, 19 March 2012

I'm sat here.... with a sore throat.... after listening to the Hump...

With a massive smile on my face - then I read some of the usual guff that so-called fans write, namely on the BBC's page, and and other well known sites and it hurts my heart.  So lets dispel some of the most widely written bollocks right here and now shall we?

1. " It's an embarrassment....." - ok? - Why?! - To take an Ali G-Ism " Is it bcoz he iz old?" - So what? - Just because you are not Loreen, or Tooji doesn’t mean you can just wither and die in the corner!! -  The aim of the contest is to win or at least do very well in it, it is NEVER the aim to get record sales out of it.  I have not seen a single good reason to say why people are embarrassed by an artist that has sold MILLIONS of records and is still selling them today - has just completed a world tour and is completing another one immediately before the contest.  He is in it for the win, not the lolz!

2 " It's not contemporary" - No, but this is the Eurovision - apparently, if you have lived in the UK for the last 30 years, nothing we ever enter is contemporary.  However, Fairytale wasn't contemporary of 2009, Running Scared is hardly contemporary of 2011 so that argument goes up in a puff of smoke.

3. " We didn’t get to choose him" - Yes, that’s right - because as of late the UK public have done *so* well in that area - Lets look at the evidence here.  The last 4 years the UK public got to choose the singer and the song we finished  22nd, 19th , 22nd and 23rd scoring a combined total of 76 whole points - Take the UK public out of part or all of the equation and we score 283 points.  It can be argued that the BBC need to take some of the blame, but really the facts are there!!

Overall we have someone that can sing, with a simple tune that the Juries will love and the real televoters outside of the UK will have to think about before picking the phone up - I think that this could do as well as Italy did last year.  If it does, i'll be so fricking happy!!

Sunday, 18 March 2012

Just cos I am not very well - Hump o CLock is 1100 CET Tomorrow ;)

Its really a very good song - but I have a sore throat so I cant *tell* you - you're just going to have to listen! - Also, 10am tomorrow morning is hump-o-clock ;)

Thursday, 15 March 2012

Best Tuesday night concert ever - EVER?

Liam Jarnecki of this parish has decreed that the First Semi Final is " The most extraordinary Tuesday Night concert in History" - He's not wrong you know, it's got all sorts of madness in it!!

Its shaped up rather well this year hasnt it?!

Friday, 9 March 2012

It's that time of year..............

The time when so called Eurovision Fans say " Oh... It's the worst Eurovision EVAH!!!"

Is it?!

Let me hear you speak!!

Thursday, 1 March 2012

The BBC are total and utter geniuses!

I think that the BBC are complete Geniuses.... Englebert can actually sing, doesnt have to learn to dance "awkwardly" - has stage craft and presence, he'll work the Audience, He'll have a song written by a half decent song writing team - for once in the last few years, it *will* be about the song, because we dont have to worry about whether the singer can sing!! - No Blue moments, No Awkward Josh Dancing, No 16 yr old slapper on stage, No Jemini Moments, No Half arsed wannabe's...... WIth the right song, this could well be a decent, if off the wall, effort.

Meet Engelbert!

So the secret is finally out then - the UK of Stuff have selected none other than the 157 year old German hitmaker Engelbert Humperdinck to nobly represent us in the 'dorf Baku.

A renowned pianist and composer, the Mendelssohn Prize winning Humperdinck is perhaps best known for his international chart-topping opera Hänsel und Gretel (Eng.: Jonsi and Greta), so let's wait to see what he's come up with for us this year!

I, for one, can't wait!

Ok peoples of Europe in a maximum of 3 words

Tell me the best and worst songs so far. Go on. I dare you :))